|

POST

+3

Jasper's Age

How old do you think Jasper is?
I personally think he's 30. Look at that receding hairline. His skin on that picture looks well tanned, more tan then an 18 year old could accomplish. It more looks like years of youth passed away very slowly, and remolded, shaped, tanned into what it is now. But the skin is like play dough, which you can remold something over and over again, but slowly over time it hardens, crusts, wrinkles, and can no longer hold its shape.
His chin, it is nice and square and manly. Tis the kind of chin that teenagers dream to have (or not). It attracts the ladies because of its manly smexiness, and thus you have his beautiful young girlfriend, who masks his age. He has drooping cheeks, and ears that have been affected by gravity to the point they are stretching downward toward the floor.

How old do you think he is?

edit: I_Agree is right.

Options
| Cancel

anonymous ranted 8 years, 1 month ago.
Rant viewed 248 times.

29

 comments for this rant

Please log in or sign up before commenting

+1
Calai commented on this rant 8 years, 1 month ago.

LOL wth is this rant? Why are you singling out Jasper?! Why is he so special?! Yeesh! =)

I thought he was like in his early 20s.

Personally, I don't like his chin and I don't find him attractive.

But, kudos to Jasper! He seems to be more mature and much more eloquent than others his age. :)

+1
I_Agree commented on this rant 8 years, 1 month ago.

I think it's referring to http://rantfoo.com/rants/514/to-jasper-from-l/#c2393


His chin is awesome by the way.

+1
Jasper commented on this rant 8 years, 1 month ago.

Noo! But we were meant to be, Calai! =(

I'll go cry in a corner now.

+1
Calai commented on this rant 8 years, 1 month ago.

Sorry, dude.

But I hope there are no spiders in that corner. Ewwww

+1
anonymous commented on this rant 8 years, 1 month ago.

Because Jasper is smexy, in a non homo way. If he wasnt so young, we could all go bro out.

+1
Calai commented on this rant 8 years, 1 month ago.

What does smexy mean? What is it a portmanteau of?

+1
XeroLimitsX commented on this rant 8 years, 1 month ago.

I think its sexy + manly = smexy

+1
Calai commented on this rant 8 years, 1 month ago.

Ohhh thanks!

+1
XeroLimitsX commented on this rant 8 years, 1 month ago.

Oooo, lets all have a LAN party. Geek it up!

+1
I_Disagree commented on this rant 8 years, 1 month ago.

ouchhh =[

+1
elle commented on this rant 8 years, 1 month ago.

they be hating my rant. HATING!

+1
Calai commented on this rant 8 years, 1 month ago.

Why you hollerin?

+1
Jasper commented on this rant 8 years, 1 month ago.

What the f***?

Edit: btw, that's a very small picture to judge me by =P

+1
Calai commented on this rant 8 years, 1 month ago.

:)

I'd almost pity you, but I don't think you like pity. :( Idk.

But my pity is available. =) Sorry, man. It's a funny rant though -- it made me laugh. lol.

+1
anonymous commented on this rant 8 years, 1 month ago.

Jasper shouldn't feel bad. At least everyone agrees that he's very attractive...Right, right??Eh? ;)

You're attractive Jasper. There's nothing to feel bad about.

+1
Calai commented on this rant 8 years, 1 month ago.

Correction. ALMOST everyone. http://rantfoo.com/rants/516/jaspers-age/#c2413

+1
Jasper commented on this rant 8 years, 1 month ago.

Just had to rub that one in. IT STINGS, AHHH.

+1
Calai commented on this rant 8 years, 1 month ago.

You're a good sport. :D

+1
Jasper commented on this rant 8 years, 1 month ago.

Pfft. You owe me dinner for this injustice. Chocolate chip pancakes please.

+1
Calai commented on this rant 8 years, 1 month ago.

I can't.

I only know how to spread cold pbj onto cold bread and cut off the crust.

+1
Jasper commented on this rant 8 years, 1 month ago.

Not even pancakes??? =(

+1
XeroLimitsX commented on this rant 8 years, 1 month ago.

Add a cold drink to that and you got yourself a nice dinner.

+1
anonymous commented on this rant 8 years, 1 month ago.

That was really the point lol. No hard feelings Jasper.

+1
anonymous commented on this rant 8 years, 1 month ago.

A man of few words.

+1
XeroLimitsX commented on this rant 8 years, 1 month ago.

Dude, he's totally poppin fresh. I think hes like 18 tbh.

+1
I_Disagree commented on this rant 8 years, 1 month ago.

^the name says all. Jasper is too much of a smexii beast to be 30. Once again no homo. =]

+1
Calai commented on this rant 8 years, 1 month ago.

Well, Jasper from the Twilight series is like a gazillion years old... but I'm not sure at what age he was turned into a vampire... >.>

+1
I_Disagree commented on this rant 8 years, 1 month ago.

nuu thats not the jasper that we were refering to.

+1
Calai commented on this rant 8 years, 1 month ago.

Yes, I know. But I was just saying.

Lol.